Last night my special encounter was someone from my past that played a big part in my life and this was my ex-wife. We had not really had a good sit down conversation in the almost four years we have apart. Our divorce began on the eve of our Holiday Open House four years ago December.
It was helpful to share some good talk about the memories and the laughs, the times that presented inside jokes or special times that only we knew about ... we obviously talked about what happened when the wheels fell off the cart so to speak.
I seem to have done more talking than her, but I expected this considering all the circumstances. I felt good at the table for the couple hours we talked. I got in my car and my heart felt heavy.
Now, mind you, I was not aspiring to rekindle a relationship or cause problems or anything like that ... but part of me had a flooding of memories and emotions that would normally have struck tears to flow. However with the marvels of modern medicine, I can't cry since the Lasik, as my tears are being produced by me on the every other hour through a bottle.
So I am hopeful as our lives cross paths that life is not uncomfortable. I an thankful, this time of season, for what I have, have had, have experienced. The depth of those experiences help to shape me, help define me and help me to realize that sometimes I do the wrong thing - and seem to make those choices more often than not.
I know that deep inside I still struggle with many things - I turn to myself to think my way out of some of those experiences. Other times I turn to a mentor to set me up straight and hear me out. I have found that I can become co-dependent on support and of course, like last night I needed to figure out a path on my own.
Anyway, I have dinner club tonight - new night - new time ... I am very excited about this ... Finally, I have made a thanksgiving dinner feast for my office staff for lunch today ... I am hopeful they enjoy.