Sep
20
Written by:
Mark Carboni
9/20/2009 5:48 AM
I had to chuckle when I read that a proposal was submitted for Amtrak to allow passengers to bring guns on board. Yeah, I know, right to bare arms and I am not against the constitution, but does our senate not have enough problems in front of it that they need to take on the failing train systems protocol for guns? Of course they could not be loaded and locked in a container ... sure, okay, lets try that on the airplane system too while we are just sitting around trying to figure out how to keep this fine Country from falling into the Red Sea of a blood bath.
A recent study warns parents that they should prohibit their children under the age of five to pet or touch an animal at a zoo. Really? You mean those friendly big cats with the enormous amount of hair around their face that normally are only seen in their natural habitat, the foot of a library staircase? Not good for kids to pet?!? I am glad that study was commissioned. Of course it was because the kids are getting E Coli ... do parents not wash their kids hands anymore? I am totally amazed that the world needs to stop doing nearly everything so parents do not have to parent any more. If it smells bad, don't drink it, eat it. If you touch something that was slimy, gooey, icky do not put your fingers in your mouth. If someone sneezes near you, turn away, wash your hands before you touch them. Where is Dr Seuss when you need him to tell parents these simple things.
Now I have heard of the Hatfields and the McCoy's feud but had no idea there was one that has been going on for decades with Adidas and Puma. It appears, over 60 years this feud has played out but this is all going to come to an end when they two companies will meet on a field to play a bit of football. It seems the founders, who were brothers, did not get along now but will once they take the fields on Monday to bring peace and joy by roughing up the others people. I think I do not follow the logic, but hey, at least they are not going to be fighting this very public war that has been dripping from the headlines day after day for 60 years.
Finally, a real hum dinger of a story, that Viagra cream may soon hit the market. I can not wait to see those commercials. People have been in an uproar about how older people were talking about ED (oh, even I can not type it) and then minutes later come out smiling after the pill produced uplifting results. Well imagine seeing some geriatric rubbing a cream that was not BenGay on body parts (or worse, that it was). So far the lab rats have enjoyed it, trust me you rub me long enough and I am certain I would be a happy camper too.
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